I have no idea what happened last night. I know I saw a bunch of friends, I stood on stage in painful shoes. I gave a speech and yet, I didn’t come home to find oodles of kitchen gear. Odd.

I did come home to a 3 year old with a fever who didn’t sleep at all, and that headache that’s been like such an attentive lover — always on my mind — is back and in full force.

I got to reconnect with a woman I went to college with — so much fun. I might be a little in love with her and I might have sat at the bar with my hands under my chin batting my eyes and smiling my pretty smile. Is Portland ready for two Sassy California Melissas? We shall see.

Here’s my presentation. The mic wasn’t working for the first few slides and I was so deer in headlights, I couldn’t work out what to do. I was also the first one up after the intermission. The organizers kept saying to me, “You’re a professional. You’re a professional. You’ll be great.” I don’t know what gave them this impression — it was my first time ever opening Power Point, and I’ve never ever spoked to a crowd that large. But whatever. I’m a professional. You can see for yourself.