I can’t write much today because I might have a book review due for a certain paper and I might have had to email the editor and blow the first deadline because the book is VERY VERY LONG. (Hi, Jeff! I’m totally working on it today and see how this is a really short blog post???? It’s because my deadline is my top priority and NOT blogging.)

I’ll bet you didn’t know this, but Kiala Krazybee and I are the same person. We both grew up in San Diego, only children, strong, working mommies, and we both live in the Pearl. Okay, I live in Upper Pearl (St. John’s) but whatever. We are the same. Except that karaoke scares the jeebers out of me. I’ve done two karaoke songs in my entire life — “Kiss” by Prince when I was like 19 and then “She Bop” at the lezzie bar where the lezzies could sense two very damning things about me 1) I like men 2) I wear lipstick. And they did not approve of “She Bop.” At. All. Thank god for the RSG, she was the only thing that stopped me from having my hair forcibly shaved into a mullet and the arms of my shirt cut off with a switchblade. I swear it.

So, anyway, I’m petrified of karaoke. It’s not to say, I wouldn’t do it, because I will again for sure. But only because of this video below.

I tell you, when Kiala said, “I’m going to do eminem,” I nearly crapped myself. It would be a little like me saying I was going to rewrite Ulysses. Except, Kiala is a karaoke pro. And, no kidding, two of Portland’s three black residents were there and they loved her. LOVED HER.

And then Superfan Erica thought she’d get up there. And I already knew Erica would rock the house. If only because both Kiala and I were so impressed with her purse and her over-night preparations that I’m pretty sure Erica will be president some day. CELL PHONE CHARGER??? If I only had a bag like that when I was 25, okay I was married at 25, but 22, then goodbye walk of shame!